I think the bigger wonder is how he pulls off the ultra mullet/porn-star mustache combo. Simply amazing.

Frank (may I call you that?)...I really enjoy eating way too much junk food topped off with lots of eggnog during the holiday season...but every time that image flashes into my head (or the image of Thomas doing anyone), I lose my appetite and throw up in my mouth just a little....

Can you save the 'Thomas having sex' references for January when I need a good appetite suppressant?

This enigma that you say is Thomas must be the one that the hill folk near my parents in VA call Billy Two Shoes. He was the one that was first to discover glass lightning and the picture tube and that new fangled thing that allows anyone to see 2 women in a loving embrace for free. He appears on track to be the Honkeytonk Pariah. God bless Thomas!

i tl bowt mislf
i strtd ridin ths sit bot 8 mnt go
mi sistr claire usd tu tipe comnts fo me
bu wudnt tipe mene shit i wnted tu sa
so i sed claire git yor saa owta th wa
i gota sa smthg to ths assls
i rede teh sit a lto
claire sez b nise tommy b nise
i sa sht yor ass claire
smtims shi cris an trw thngs at mi
i go ladup a wrk os i hve tyme
i liv wit claire shi hsa boifrnd hoo si a puss
i kik hsi ass sumtms
hi sa shit lik tommy fi yo wrnt rtrded i kik yor ass
i say i no rtrded an caraty chp hsi ass
i tap leo mom ass al th tyme to
o tommy
o leo mom
o tommy
o leo mom
yo dun tommy lredy
ya i dun
dam
frak i won tap yor ss i no qwir
so evn to yo mi onle frend i stll no qwir wit yo
wontim srcstc on giv mi siber sx
o ya
sh plaz har to git bt i no she wan tu tap mi ass

Not hard to get...impossible to get.

I'm pure for life...and I learned never to log into YBNBY on a university computer lab PC again....because some smark aleck used my login to commit 20 seconds worth of unspeakable acts.

I do think that reading Thomas' remarks is like learning to read upside down books--once you get the hang of it, it's easy--and a feeling of accomplishment as well.

nise exuse srcst on
tht mustv ben th sam prson hoo sen mi priavat emal askn fi i wsa hrney
an sed tehy wer yoo an no to tel no on
yoo no yo wna rid thomas teh trane
yoo no it an i no ti
o tommy yo mak mi hrne
yo no yoo sedit

Thomas appeared about the same time Johnny left. Hmm....

nope...Thomas appeared for the first time during Dave's first disappearance...he told me that Dave was dead.

dave's first disappearance ? ... dave has done this vanishing act before ? .. dave who knows casper wyoming in such intimate detail that he could only be a native ? . and as for thomas .. I have yet to master the thomas-english dictionary .. but I'm tryin .. perhaps dave/thomas are one in the same .. alter egos of each other .. dave who wanted to know about pooping pants and thomas who wants to know about tapping and leo's mom ... hmmm ... they do both have dark hair ...

Ahh, alex...yes, Dave has disappeared more than once--which is why he said goodbye this time--we've given him hell for not announcing a disappearance/vacation.
As for your conspiracy theory, unfortunately the forums are not searchable once they drop off (I think that will be Scara's holiday present to the L77), or you would know that that theory has been tossed about already.

Nothing will make Dave mad faster than to compare him to the 'genius' of Thomas.

*waits for dave's wrath to fall on her head*

good to see you sarcky .. and good to be seen by you too

hey...if the wrath brings him back, it's worth it...

poor Tim missed the 80s t-shirt contest...someone needs to insult one of his teams and stat!

Hahahah... Dave has gave me hell for comparing him to Thomas and saying that he might be a creation of the writers minds, like a boogie commenter they all had access to write things that could blaze up the threads...

Interesting was the fact that in the first Dave's disappearance, Thomas came up telling that he personally knew Dave, and had known that he was dead, and along came two or three other commenters saying the same. One of them has sent us a link to the obituary of some other Dave.

I've got the link to the old forum posts on my RSS reader... alex, you can have an idea of how it had been on Dave's disappearing on these posts:
http://tinyurl.com/6czjdb
http://tinyurl.com/6nvvyj
I don't remember which other posts contain pieces of the discussion...

okokokokoko
i tll yo hoo i am ni cod:

smpl smon mt a pman
gong to th far
sad smpl smon to th pman
lt m tast your war

Ok, Thomas. Do you like pies, or have you got no money? Or both?

leo i spect betr frm yoo sugr tist
i rilly don wnt to giv n e mor cluz

hou yor moma
mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

Maybe you have given me one right now...

Boy thomas And I thought Everyone Really liked you for your insight. MAN i suck.

Jonnie... I was thinking of that too...

Most of the references to the rhyme come from sites hosted in the Queen's land.

Damn... clicked on submit by accident...

Most of the references to the rhyme come from sites hosted in the Queen's land. What had me thinking about Scaramouch.

But then, taking another look on the comments I saw him throwing that Tommy has appeared as JW vanished... Why would he do that after all the Dave-Thomas debate months ago?

leo tis yor momma
be nise 2 tommy
hi a gud la an hto ni bed
hi prolly gona bi yor dady

Dave may be out searching for candy cigarettes. I told him I got a box and was going to offer them as caption prize soon. But that was a month ago and he was sick of waiting for me to find the right photo so he grabbed his hiking boots and set out in search of a childhood fix.

Ug.. I can't read his stuff.. I like this site because almost everyone says funny things - except those damn gibberish posts. They were funny the first time I read it, and then made me want to smack my head against the wall.

His posts are all wacky because whoever is doing it lacks creative ambition to come up with anything good. Dude, Sasha Cohen already did it. Thomas is a horrible knock-off of Borat. It's like writing the words ROLEX on your TIMEX and wearing it as bling.

If you are trying to learn another language, and chat with people, there will eventually be some improvement. And sure, it's hard learning a new language, but there are some words that one must TRY to mess up. With Thomas' posts, there are never any out of context phrases - indicative of someone who knows the structure of the language. EG: he's never said "what is for donkey and peanut butter car!" And I've never seen him exchange one word for similar word with a completely different meaning. EG: "Hey baby, want to go back to my horse for sex?" These are things you would expect to see by someone learning a language. None of which he does. His posts are fake. End of story. And I bet that his mullet and child molester 'stache are fake too.

tha fian jibo i rethr yo cal mi assl thn mke mi fil bad
i go bak tu mi horse an leve yesbutnobutyes frevr

bi onle frnd frak

peyess
jibo wat si fo dokey an penus buter
yor moma
jibo si assl frevr

No no, that's not what I'm saying at all. I don't want you to leave forever. Your posts have some entertainment value. Just not for me.

I'm just saying the choppy short hand language you use in your posts is fake. You can obviously understand english, because you picked points from my post and realized that a) I was mildly insulting you, and b) that I found accurate flaws in your act. Then, to go a step further, you took my suggestion on how to sound like a fake foreigner, and worked it into your post.

By now everyone should be thoroughly convinced that your posts are created to make you appear to be 100x the nitwit that you obviously aren't. But does that mean you should leave? No. Like I said, your posts have some entertainment value. And far-be-it of me (a longtime reader, new poster) to suggest anyone should leave a site. I'm just saying that Thomas isn't really who Thomas portrays Thomas as. And I never would have thought of saying anything like that if Frank hadn't started this topic. Thanks Frank for making me the dick.

Hey Jimbo, don't worry. No one here is going to judge you and point the finger to you on Thomas departure.
I lost the count of how many times he said he was going out for good, that he had real friends on "mispac", here we were all "assls".

Keep cool. You're not getting in trouble for that. He'll be back soon, picking on someone else, and always picking on me and leos mom...

I for one, won't think you're a dick. It's funny to start reading ybnby each day thinking who'll be Tommy's target that day.

Oh Don't worry. Tommy will be back. He's like a bad case of "gentil wrats" He always pops back up

There is a very specific clue there that it appears Johnnie got, but I do not know how he is drawing the conclusion he is from the clue given.

Does everyone see what is going on with the clue from Thomas?

clue ? .. thomas gave a clue ? ... I still can't read thomas nevermind a clue ! ... I took sarcky's advise and read thomas outloud "almost by myself" saying "penus buter" out loud over and over while those around me shook their heads and gently asked me to back away from the screen ..

*hands frank a pillow for his head .. (will need it back for the pillowfightclub though .. ) *

Jonnie -

How do you know it is 'that one'? Is it just because of the two-letter clue we got, or is there more to it that I am missing?

simple simon met a pie man
going to the fair
said simple simon to the pie man
let me taste your wares

I just went with pie man sounds closest to baierman. it might not be the best logic around.

Oh, I thought you had something more ... centering around the fact that the only letters missing are all 'i' and 'e'.

The only contradictor not having an 'i' or 'e' in the name is our fearless leader.

I'm guessing that the logic is more complicated than that.

I'm sure that the real author is using some kind of gibberish translator; but I can't figure out the code. Not that it matters ... I don't think it adds any value to the clues.

Tim

Your logic is much to complicated and intelligent for me to comprehend, I must now go read a post by Echowood.

Frank -

Thomas has all but admitted that he has another identity. He keeps giving 'clues' about his true being. Scaramouch knows what is going on, but keeps it hush. I suspect that a few others know as well.

The movie Kingpin has been a big part of the clues. Thomas first post was written normal, commenting that he liked the movie. A subsequent post from Johnny Wright has a picture of him posing with a Woody Harrelson look-alike in Kingpin garb ... though that might be stretch. Now, the clue that deliberately omits all 'i' and 'e' letters.

Confusing.

Frank, that's true. But those are not 'clues' left deliberately by Thomas, just an attempt to communicate.

The simple simon post was specifically labelled as a clue. Then, he proceeded to deliberately remove only the 'i' and 'e' characters. It means something, but I have no idea what.

i before e except after C...

is it Miss C? She of the missing keyboard letters????

(prob not...I like to muddle up the path a bit to confuse you guys)

Sarcky - We think alike. I already checked that to see if the letters her keyboard was missing in that post were the same. Not.

Though that would have been supremely clever.

This is probably something ridiculously simple, like the i and e stand for Eddie Izzard or something. We couldn't possibly be entertaining enough to garner the interest of such a big star, though.

Could we?

I bet that's it!

Thomas is a character collaberation between Woody Harrelson and Eddie Izzard ... who happened to be posing here as Johnny Wright.

Which means, Echowood is really Woody Harrelson.

and, therefore ....

A WITCH!!!!!

Sir Bedevere: There are ways of telling whether she is a witch.
Peasant 1: Are there? Oh well, tell us.
Sir Bedevere: Tell me. What do you do with witches?
Peasant 1: Burn them.
Sir Bedevere: And what do you burn, apart from witches?
Peasant 1: More witches.
Peasant 2: Wood.
Sir Bedevere: Good. Now, why do witches burn?
Peasant 3: ...because they're made of... wood?
Sir Bedevere: Good. So how do you tell whether she is made of wood?
Peasant 1: Build a bridge out of her.
Sir Bedevere: But can you not also build bridges out of stone?
Peasant 1: Oh yeah.
Sir Bedevere: Does wood sink in water?
Peasant 1: No, no, it floats!... It floats! Throw her into the pond!
Sir Bedevere: No, no. What else floats in water?
Peasant 1: Bread.
Peasant 2: Apples.
Peasant 3: Very small rocks.
Peasant 1: Cider.
Peasant 2: Gravy.
Peasant 3: Cherries.
Peasant 1: Mud.
Peasant 2: Churches.
Peasant 3: Lead! Lead!
King Arthur: A Duck.
Sir Bedevere: ...Exactly. So, logically...
Peasant 1: If she weighed the same as a duck... she's made of wood.
Sir Bedevere: And therefore...
Peasant 2: ...A witch!

... and another one has been exposed!

(No she hasn't.)

hang on .. are we back to the pygmy bananas ? ..